It’s been a few weeks since I was ordained a permanent deacon. After four years of deacon formation, there were still some things for which I was not totally prepared. Here are seven … Quick Takes style.
Good friend. Good advice.
Everything — A good friend of mine, Deacon Andrew pictured with me above, was ordained a transitional deacon just a few months before me, and he offered some excellent spiritual advice. “Be gentle with yourself.” He was referring to the post-ordination expectation that the new deacon knows everything about being a deacon. He wasn’t kidding. This has been an indispensable piece of advice during the first several weeks. Nearly everything that was once familiar is now different.
Triune blessings — First thing following ordination, a few people asked me to bless their children. You know, Father-Son-Holy Spirit with the Sign of the Cross. Uh, okay. Is there a right way? Perhaps more importantly, is there a WRONGÂ way?
Holy Water — Word on the street is that I can “make” Holy Water and bless other objects? What are the rubrics around that, please?
“Deacon Daddy, it’s empty, and I need a blessing now.”
Assisting at Mass — At the Basilica of St. John, one of our primary charisms is liturgy. Our “High” Mass with the incense, chanted prayers, and choir/organ music is as good as I’ve experienced the Novus Ordo celebrated. However, there’s a lot going on that we didn’t cover during deacon formation. Prior to ordination, I was ultra-observant, either in the pew or as an “assistant” MC. But there are many subtleties I missed until I needed to know them as a deacon. What is the proper way to incense the Book of the Gospels, or the assembly, or the priest? Are they all the same? How many swings for each and in which direction? [Insert lengthy litany of liturgical questions here.]
Book of the Gospels — I wish I had become more familiar with this, which you never use as a layperson. What’s the big deal? If you’ve proclaimed the Word from the Lectionary, what’s the difference? Well, the Lectionary has only one cycle of readings (A,B, or C) in it while the Book of the Gospels contains all three cycles. That’s helpful to know because a rookie deacon could otherwise begin to proclaim the wrong Gospel reading and have to be corrected part-way by the seasoned deacon sitting behind him. And if the Mass is telecast, the whole world potentially could see the mistake. Not that I’d know anything about that.
#DeaconFail
- Side note #1: There’s no trap door behind the ambo at the Basilica.
- Side note #2: Most people are really kind when a new deacon messes up this part. Just not the people pictured above.
Clearly, deacon formation continues … with an emphasis in humility.
No hiding — I went to a potluck dinner earlier this week for a program our daughter is involved with this school year. I went to the potluck simply as her dad, one of many parents in attendance. However, I was the only ordained person there. Hence, I was asked to lead grace (no big deal) and offer “the Church’s blessing.” What? See point #2. Still getting comfortable with that one.
Sitting apart — This stinks, particularly for Lisa who is in the pew by herself with our young children. Please note that our priest doesn’t categorically forbid me from sitting in the assembly on occasion, so don’t send him any hate mail. Also, Lisa and I don’t disagree with my regular service at the altar. I’m ordained to serve the people of God, and one of the primary ways to do that is through the liturgy. But knowing that fact beforehand and experiencing it now post-ordination are two different things. Way different. This is just hard, and we still haven’t figured out the best way to handle this. We’ll get through it the same way we got through formation — with the help of the community.
For more Quick Takes, visit Jen’s place!
Haha love it!!! “Making holy water” was definitely the first thing we hit my dad up with after he was ordained. Hilarious!!! Major perk
I love this honest perspective. We all feel a bit ill equipped in doing God´s work. Your honesty helps me and I´m sure others know we don´t need to know everything. Just say yes and God will take care of the rest!
Hey Joel!
Here is the simple blessing of articles for devotion from the Shorter Book of Blessings (available on Amazon – handy book!):
“May this (name of article) and the one who uses it be blessed,
in the name of the Father, and of the Son, + and of the Holy Spirit.
Amen.”
And a short blessing for holy water, from the Canadian version of the same book:
“Father, bless + this water! and let it be a reminder for us of our baptism.
Help us to live as people of light, and to be blameless and worthy in your sight.
All honour and praise be yours, Father, through Christ our Lord and Saviour.
Amen.”
(The little + refers to the priest/deacon making the sign of the cross over the object.)
(Heh. And I just noticed the superfluous ! after “water”. That should be a comma. I mean, blessing water is pretty exciting but usually the liturgical books are a bit more understated than that. :-))
Fr. Darryl, thanks very much for the helpful resources! Through the formation process, we got the books for the Rites of Baptism, Marriage, Christian Funerals, and Christian Initiation of Adults. One would think the Book of Blessings, or at least the Shorter Book of Blessings, would have been part of the package. A number of people gave me gift certificates to our local Catholic bookstore. I’ll have to pick either of those up.
FYI, I thought the gratuitous ! was thrown in for my benefit. Hey, everything is exciting the first time you do it, right? ;)
As for incensing, I like the notes that Fr. McNamara on Zenit:
http://www.zenit.org/en/articles/incensing-the-host-altars-etc
For the blessing of a person, it’s generally a safe bet to do the blessing like what is in the Missal:
“May almighty God bless you, the Father, and the Son, + and the Holy Spirit. Amen.”
Or
“May the blessing of almighty God,
the Father, and the Son, + and the Holy Spirit
come down on you and remain with you for ever. Amen.”
I usually begin with “The Lord be with you. (And with your spirit.)” like how it’s done at Mass or at another liturgy.
You are doing great! And this picture cracks me up.
Hey, it´s an easy mistake to make….back in the day, I used to be a lector and I could rehearse those readings EVERY..SINGLE..DAY.. in the week preceding the Sunday I had to read, and the second I got up there, I´d look at that lectionary and my mind would completely go stupid. I think the second we stop being “scared” is when we aren´t taking it seriously enough anymore. So, that mistake is an easy one to make. You´ll be telling people fondly about this little incident for the rest of your life. :)
Jean, you get it. One of my biggest fears was that people would think I didn’t prepare. I did, but when a different Gospel reading was staring me right in the face, I assumed I must have prepared incorrectly. And here’s the thing, had the wrong reading been from Mark or Luke, it might have dawned on me that I was looking at the wrong cycle. However, next year’s Gospel reading for the 21st Sunday in OT is from John, which didn’t clue me in to anything. I asked myself about a dozen questions in a split second including, “What if this doesn’t match Father’s homily?” Thank goodness Dcn. Frank came and bailed me out. Everyone involved handled the whole thing so graciously.
If this means you proclaimed the wrong Gospel no worries , I never did that yet but I did once leave a part out from a second page , top that one , don´t worry wait til you space off during the mass but that won´t happen to you your not old enough yet blessings DB
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This was so unbelievably honest and funny! I have several close friends that are deacons who have also shared with me the behind the scenes “Thank goodness no one noticed!” moments! Just remember that God must have a sense of humor too. :)
This is so great to hear. :)
Please keep sharing your observations! I’m following them carefully. I’ve just begun Diaconate formation with Cohort XV, so God willing, I’ll be standing in your shoes in another 4 years…
Haha! Love it. As a newly ordained deacon, I face similar issues. I have a very active, bubbly 2 year old daughter who always manages to add a bit of extra especially when I chant. She’d ask beloved at the top of her voice, ‘mum, why does dad sing so silly, or where’s my funny hat like bishop uncle Pete’? Love every moment though.