The Kiss of Jesus

I’ve scaled back on participating in book reviews and blog tours, primarily because I want to safeguard my holy leisure reading time for whatever the current book is for Well-Read Mom. But when I received the request to participate in the blog tour for The Kiss of Jesus by Donna-Marie Cooper O’Boyle, my intuition told me to give the book a good look before declining participation.

30 seconds into the book, on the first page of the preface I read,

… I had been a single mother to five children for many years …”

Now you may know Donna-Marie Cooper O’Boyle as I do, strictly from her public persona. She’s that lovely woman with the soothing voice who has two first names and two last names and is frequently heard and seen on Catholic media. You know, the woman who knew Blessed Mother Teresa personally and wrote about their relationship in the book Mother Teresa and Me: Ten Years of Friendship.

She was a single mother to five children?! I had no clue.

Right then I knew I had to read The Kiss of Jesus. I was immediately reminded of a universal truth that crosses every ethnic, socioeconomic, gender, religious, {insert group} line: Everyone has a story, and now I was quite curious to know more about Donna-Marie’s. I hit close to a personal best record — I read this book in less than 24 hours (even while stopping to watch the Packers and the Cubs play their respective sports), and I’ve already quoted many portions of the book to several people. Here are a few thoughts and themes that continue to resonate with me.

Commonalities

On the surface, I found many things in common with Donna-Marie: we both grew up in stable Catholic homes with fathers who had a knack for tending to vegetable gardens, we both found ourselves  in unhealthy relationships in our late teens/early twenties, both experienced multiple pregnancy losses, both discovered — thanks to Texas — that sweating makes us incredibly uncomfortable, and we both have defining moments where the Holy Spirit has sent a bird to let us know that all will be well.

As I found commonalities in our stories, I continued to draw deeper into Donna-Marie’s life. Again, everyone has a story. She has one. I have one. You have one. Never doubt that God will make straight with our crooked lines and that our personal, authentic witnesses may be the evangelical seed that’s planted so another can grow deeper to the heart of Jesus.

The Power of Suffering

Father John Hardon said, “To be a true Christian means to expect the cross. To be a true Christian means not to run away from the cross.” Throughout the book Donna-Marie provides a backdrop to better understand, or shall I say accept, the great mystery of suffering. One of my favorite lines in the book comes from Blessed Mother Teresa, “Suffering is the sharing in the Passion of Christ. Suffering is the kiss of Jesus, a sign that you have come so close to Jesus on the Cross that He can kiss you.”

Suffering allows us to draw closer to the cross so Jesus can kiss us. What a powerful image to ponder with and be consoled by. I doubt I’ll look at a crucifix the same again. Can’t you just envision Jesus leaning in to kiss you?

The Importance of Spiritual Direction/Counsel

We can’t all have people such as Blessed Mother Teresa and the Venerable Father John Hardon providing spiritual counsel as they did for Donna-Maria (can you even imagine what that’s like?), but time and again throughout the book, I was reminded how powerful and necessary spiritual direction is in the development of the moral life. Receiving direction isn’t going to keep us from harm or magically remove all challenges, but it certainly polishes our armor and helps keep us rooted during temptation and times of trial. I enjoyed reading about how Donna-Marie benefited both from a spiritual father and a spiritual mother — a reminder of the divine complimentarity of the genders.

A Woman’s Missionary Role in the Culture

Speaking of genders, Donna-Marie reminds us women that we are called to be missionaries of truth about the dignity of women. If you haven’t yet read St. Pope John Paul II’s Mulieris Dignitatem (On the Dignity and Vocation of Women), do it today in honor of his feast day! And if you have already read it, well read it again … in honor of his feast day!

A Dish of Rice and the Vocation of Love

Donna-Marie wrote that Blessed Mother Teresa said it is far easier to serve a dish of rice to a starving person on the other side of the world than it is to serve that dish of rice to someone in our own home who is starving for love.

That quote got me good, right in the heart, and I’m still ruminating on it.

Joel is often asked how he balances the demands of family life with his diaconate responsibilities. His usual response typically underscores that even as a deacon, his home is primary mission territory. Meaning, he must be sure he’s attending to and taking care of our needs here at home before serving the needs of an entire parish or beyond.

Since reading this passage in the book, there have been several times, thanks to the dish of rice analogy, where I’ve been motivated to put down whatever silly (or important!) thing I’m working on or distracted by in favor of simply sitting with my children and loving up on them. Donna-Marie writes that we are all called to a “vocation of love,” and those words are echoing through my mind day in and out now. How are we showing Christ’s love to all we encounter?

My Husband

Finally, while you’re here, one last somewhat related thought. Not only is today St. John Paul II’s feast day, but it’s Joel’s and my anniversary. Eleven years! As I read Donna-Marie’s memoir, I thought a lot about my husband Joel and how blessed I am to have him in my life. He serves me “several dishes of rice” every day. He totally gets it right, and for that, I’m truly grateful.

Check out Donna-Marie Cooper O’Boyle’s new book The Kiss of Jesus, available here for purchase.